My Sweetest Grandma

It's been long that I haven't posted anything here. Was quiet busy with lot of things, figuring out too many things. My beloved sweet grandma passed away on April 15th. It was very painful for me. The reason being, I stayed with her during my Engineering days and I have known her very closely. She is a very sweet lady. Even though she did not know how to read and write, she was very good at picking up English words while we speak and she would repeat them. Whenever we watch NGC or Discovery channel, she would watch very keenly and ask questions about the show. When I had a crush on a guy during my first year in the company and when I told her about it, she did not make a big fuss about it, instead she said, If the guy is good and if God Willing, why not?. She was way ahead of her time. When I used to take my Dad to hospital and stay with him in the hospital when he was not well, she would tell my Dad, 'She is not your daughter, she is your Son" and that would move me to tears. Even at the age of 82, she wanted to wash her clothes on her own. even a day before she passed away, when she was in the hospital, not able to get up from her bed, she went to the bathroom on her own and wanted to wash her saree. I have so much love for her and I always will. I know she is seeing me from a far away land and I want to thank her for bringing us up. For staying awake for 3 months when I was a baby and could not stop crying whole night, I want to thank her for all the summer holidays she would bear with us when we made a big mess of the house which she maintained so well. I want to thank her for cooking food for me every single dayand doing all the household chores without letting me lift even a tumbler when I was doing my Engineering, and lastly I want to thank her for being with us in our house and bringing such a charm to it.

May her soul rest in Peace...

A Simple Act

The lift at my office was about to close, when I approached it.There was only one girl in the lift. She saw me and held it open for me. And as soon as I got in, she pressed the button to my floor which is 3rd and I gathered from the other button which was glowing, that she works in 7th floor. This girl takes the same bus as me to office everyday. But as far as I remember we might have taken the same lift not more than twice. I was really surprised to know that, this person whom I have never talked to, knows which floor I work in and she held the lift open for me, where in, I have seen people who are in such hurry that, even if they see people coming towards lift, they just close the lift as fast as possible,so that they can reach early. After this experience in the morning, I involuntarily had a smile on my face. I thought, how easy it is to make someone happy and feel important just by a simple act. There is so much power in one person, one word and one act.

Yet, we see people screaming at others, saying hurtful things and behaving in unkind way.  Just like one person's words or acts can make your day, a person's hurtful words and actions can ruin your day. Being nice is not tough and the results are wonderful. But people find it easy to be selfish and rude and complain that their life is tough. What you sow is what you reap. And we always tend to forget that. We are so much blinded by our ego and selfishness that we can't see the beauty and simplicity of love,kindness and being yourself.

May be the girl who was nice to me today, has an eidetic memory or a photographic memory. She might have seen me press 3 once and remembers it. Or may be we might have taken the same lift more number of times than I can remember/recall. But the point is , she chose to press that number for me, letting me know that," hey! I know where you work!" Neither her ego nor her pride dominated her instincts. which made me feel important. Made me feel that may be I am a noticeable person. People do notice me. Not like I am invisible. That is enough to make one's day. And it did. When strangers are capable of making us this happy, imagine how much our loved ones are capable of. and how much we are capable of doing to our loved ones.

When you are capable of bringing joy, don't waste it in making someone cry!! 

Everlasting Love

I happened to watch this video of an elderly couple, where the husband takes care of his wife who is suffering from Alzheimer's disease. She can't remember who he is. And when she asks "Who are you?" He explains tiny and beautiful details about her and her idiosyncrasies. After some time she asks the same question again "Who are you"? But that doesn't stop the husband. He starts all over again.

This reminded me of a story which I read somewhere. A husband goes to the hospital everyday to see his wife who has Alzheimer's disease. She does not recognize him. Yet, he goes everyday to take care of her. One day a person in the hospital asks him "Why do you come here everyday?she does not even know who you are..". To this,the husband replies "But I know who she is...".

What do these stories tell us? We love someone, just because we love them. If we love someone for a reason and that reason is taken away, do we still love them? If we do not, that means our love was based on conditions and selfishness. Loving someone for what they are and not for, what they can do for you, is the most crucial thing in a relationship and most precious too. Because once you know that, it's blissful. You will love a person for eternity, even if the whole world around you changes. Even if that person changes.

Read this somewhere, ‘When you love a flower you don’t pluck it, you water it, nurture it and just watch it being beautiful…’

The Walk

(This blog contains spoilers, please do not read if you are planning to watch the movie ‘The Walk’)

Yesterday I had been to watch the movie ‘The Walk’. I just loved the concept and the way the movie was made. This is based on a true story of a wire walker “Phillippe Petit”. A wonderful, adventurous journey of a man and his dream to hang a wire between twin towers (WTC) and walk on it. It just sends shivers down your spine. It really does.

It was so enchanting to see his determination and passion. Having a goal, carefully assessing it, examining the situation, planning perfectly and most of all, not caring what others say and no matter what, strive for your goal day and night with every ounce of your soul and body and NOT GIVING UP.

We always have people to pull us down. Things which people can’t do, sound crazy to them or they just can’t comprehend. If Phillippe Petit had thought about that, then I don’t think he would have been able to achieve what he achieved.

And one more thing which actually caught my attention was the support system of his friends. His friends and acquaintances   who support him throughout his entire mission. I have so much respect for them. People are there to encourage you and be there for you when they know that you are successful. But people who stand by you, even when the whole world thinks you are insane are the people whom you should never let go.

All in all, the movie just enthralled me. And I wish people come up with more movies like this instead of our same old Bollywood love stories.

War and Peace

Today,I was watching Richard Gere's talk about Buddhism.He was talking about uncertainty in our lives and the effect of desire. He said, If I love a cookie and I desire for it, I will be happy when I get it. it truly gives me happiness in the first bite. Second cookie? not so much, the third, fourth, fifth, and by tenth cookie, I am like, "I hate cookies". That is what everything around us, is about. We think, these material things give us happiness. But that is not true. Right? Even people can't give us happiness always, no matter how much we love them, or how much they love us. there are chances of things going wrong between two people. Sometimes we may think, we should leave all this superficial world and go somewhere far. Away from everything and everyone. Will we be happy then? No.. We will still find problems in the environment we are living in or we will attach ourselves to the past so much so that we barely can see the present. 

Now what is the solution?I haven't figured it out yet. But I know one thing that, all we can do is enjoy the present moment and spend as much time as possible in things, which when you think of 10 years later, will make you feel proud of yourself.We all make mistakes. But learning from those mistakes is important and also understand that others make mistakes just like us. Forgive and forget. Hurting others is in turn a burden on us, not them. I have tried hurting people who hurt me. But seeing them get hurt has never made me happy. It's like heavy weight on your heart. Sometimes we misinterpret people's behavior and take harsh decisions. Which again leads to a chain reaction. We talk about violence, we talk about treachery, hurt and deceit.But how much of this have we got in us? May be in less quantity. But it's still there. We need to cleanse this bit by bit. Find your enemies. I mean "your enemies". Six of them. (Arishadvargas: kama, krodha, mada, moha, lobha and mathsara), lust,anger,ego,delusion,greed and jealousy respectively. Next time, watch and observe when do you display these qualities. Make a note of it. And try to work on these.Let us win the battle with our enemies bit by bit.

Wars are not fought between countries, wars are not fought between people, wars are fought within ourselves.

Reward for understanding 'HIS' ways

                                      I was overly pampered when I was a child and also, needless to say I was a notorious kid. My mother was the only one who could set me straight. I always, somehow used to get my way with everything and with everyone. But my Mom would never allow that, unless it is justified. I would simply fight and argue with mom, to give the toys I wanted or prepare the food of my choice. Mom would never agree to those things unless I behaved properly. But sometimes, when Mom was busy and tensed If I keep playing without troubling her, or If I do some small tasks like keeping the room tidy, finishing my lunch or even being quiet without causing any problem, then Mom would treat me by preparing my favourite food or she would let me play with some expensive and fragile toys which were not meant to be played with on a daily basis. All I had to do was keep quiet and I would get my reward. But the next day, I would behave in the same argumentative, spoilt child way. Because kids do not understand these things. Now that we are adults, we think we can comprehend any situation and make it work. But things have not changed. We still have that argumentative, cribbing and crying kid within us.

Today, my day was very hectic, lot of work at office, too many people emitting negative energy all over the place. I was so exhausted. Usually when this happens, I tend to acquire negative energy from them and I behave either in an angry or a condescending way. If not, at least these thoughts keep bothering me for quite some time .And as a result, I tend to become capricious. This is a chain reaction. I say something to someone or behave in a certain way and people react according to that, and I react in turn and this goes on.

Now, If you think about it, all it takes is just silence to set things right. Accept what is happening, accept your shortcomings and do not take any step in anger. Today, many times I was given a chance to become angry, tensed, anxious and judgemental. But something in me told to keep calm. I just let everything pass by. As if to test my patience, God presented these situations multiple times and each time fiercer than before. But I was determined not to lose control. I kept my promise which I made with myself. End of the day, I felt so much at peace. I do not have any guilt bothering me, I do not need to repent the words which I cannot take back and I did not distort my personality.

God is like a mother who wants the kids to behave in a certain way. All you need to do is keep quiet and observe what situations he puts you in, accept it and handle the situation like a mature individual. Once this change begins in you, the world around you begins to change. The people may take some time to notice this, but do not lose hope. Be the best person you can be. Try to become the best person you know. I tried this today and I will keep trying this because now I have understood HIS ways.

And now that I behaved like a good child, I know that my reward is on the way. 

Change is the rule of Universe

Today, when I was talking to my brother he told me about this funny friend of his, who picks up a random object in the room belonging to some person and asks "who's pen is this?" or "whose book is this?" etc. If that person replies "It's mine", he will go on saying in a dramatic tone:"Today it's yours, yesterday it was someone else's tomorrow it will go to some other person. So don't say it's yours. Nothing is yours". I know this guy is being funny. But isn't that actually true? I mean we get attached to everything. We put stickers on things and even people. This is my pen, this is my book, this person is mine.

But things change, people change, situations change. That is the gist of Bhagavad Geeta. Isn't it? If a person who is close to you moves away, How long will you sit and cry? Or how long will that person miss you? One day people understand, find some other person, forget about everything and move on. People are here to look after themselves. When the conditions are favourable, they stay, everything is like a fairy tale. Once the conditions start becoming uncomfortable, like the birds which migrate to different part of the world, people move on.

The best we can do to keep ourselves from hurting is, try not labelling everything. You purchase some things, use them as long as you can then forget about it. give it to charity or someone else to use or throw them in the trash. If it's people, be happy with them as long as they are there. when they act in a certain way which according to you is not correct, then understand that and move on.

The battles which make you strong are the battles fought alone. All that is on which you have control is you. Nothing else no one else..

As MJ says " Take a look at yourself and then make a change".